Do you feel like you’re behind in life?
I’ll be honest, sometimes I do.
I’ve been making videos and content for years now.
And sometimes I slip into comparing myself to some of the other men in this space with hundreds of thousands of followers.
It doesn’t feel good.
Now, I know I’m not the only man who feels this way.
So today I want to share with you a few ideas that encourage me to keep going when it all feels a bit futile.
If you’re feeling behind in life, remember this…
1) The only real success is living a life true to yourself
Getting married. Having kids. Having a big house and a fat 401k saved up is all well and good.
But what if that’s not your idea of success?
Too often we make comparisons to people living lives that we wouldn’t choose.
A question to ask is “Am I living an authentic life?”
… there are plenty of people who achieve worldly success but still feel hollow.
Because they’re living a life that isn’t their own.
2) It’s never too late
You might be in your 30s or even older.
But you aren’t dead. And your best days don’t need to be behind you.
There’s absolutely no reason why you can’t build the life of your dreams.
A man needs just one solid year to reinvent himself.
All he needs is the commitment to making it happen.
Fun fact… do you know how old Samuel L. Jackson was before he became even remotely famous?
He was well into his 40s.
Don’t let your age become an excuse.
Whatever you want to do, it’s never too late to start.
3) Be your own loving big brother
If you pay attention, being behind isn’t actually the problem.
Do you know what is?
It’s that voice in your head
That inner critic who constantly judges and criticizes you.
And no matter what you achieve, it will never end.
People build entire lives based around this nasty inner voice and they wonder why they still feel miserable.
The point is that you don’t have to wait until you’ve achieved enough to feel worthy of your self-respect.
You deserve respect already.
Talk to yourself as though you were your own loving big brother who wanted the best for you.
4) Everybody has problems
Think of the most successful person you can.
The person you look up to the most who makes you feel totally inferior.
That person will grow old. Get sick.
Will lose people.
Will feel afraid, unsure and lost sometimes.
Nobody’s life is perfect.
So take off the rose-tinted glasses.
And instead of the usual competitive frame of “me vs him” …
See if you can be happy for those you usually compare yourself to.
Wish them well. Wish them more success in the future.
This makes you a more heart-centred man.
A powerful motherfucker.
And a much happier person, too.
Hope this helps.
Oliver “Dalai Lama” Cowlishaw