January 17

Should You Use Dating Apps As A Man?


Hey guys. 

I had some thoughts that I wrote in my journal today and wanted to share them with you. It's about dating apps and how they can help or hinder your process of becoming a man who women are naturally attracted to.

With that in mind, here's when you should/shouldn't use them IMO.

If you...

  • Cannot confidently approach a woman and talk to her.
  • Have few/no hobbies or interests.
  • Lack social skills and struggle talking to people in general.
  • Almost never go out.
  • Rarely meet new women in real life.

Then you should absolutely not use dating apps.

This is because...

  1. Unless you get consistent matches they fuck up your confidence and warp your self-image, making it heavily biased towards the negative.
  2. They become yet another addiction that distracts you from building a life you love and becoming a confident man that women naturally want to date.
  3. If dating apps aren't working, they progressively lower your standards. When you don't get a match in weeks, you start craving ANY match. This is a horrible place to be and a downward spiral of low self-esteem.


Dating apps can be useful if you've already got the above taken care of. Even then though, I still suggest that for most guys, online dating makes up 20% of your focus when it comes to your dating life at most.

So for guys who struggle with online dating, I suggest a 30-day detox where they:

  • Quit porn (I know it's random but it helps a lot).
  • Quit dating apps.
  • Take up a confidence building social activity (dance, martial arts, public speaking).
  • Do a certain number of cold approaches per week (whatever is do-able for you).

Then after 30 days, you can re-assess. It should be enough to break you out of a rut.

Anyway, I hope this is fuel for thought.

Good luck brothers.



dating, dating apps, dating apps as a man, dating for men

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