March 30

How To Actually Become High Status (even if you’re broke)

You can become high status even if you're broke.

And today, I'm going to tell you how.

In this article, I'm going to breakdown what status is and why it's important.

You're going to realise why money doesn't actually matter.

And I'm going to give you the strategy you can use to raise your status even if you're broke, short or have milky pale skin like me.

So what is status and why is it important?

Status is the influence, deference, and attention someone commands in a community.

I used to think status was just an alpha bro buzzword.

But I was wrong.

Status is real and important.

Men who have little status in society tend to live much harder lives.

They're paid less.

They're less attractive.

They're much more likely to suffer from anxiety and depression.

When men say they feel like a loser, this is what they're referring to.

Raising your status will make your life better in every conceivable way.

But most men get this completely wrong.

And most advice you hear on this will actually make your life worse.

Because most advice online teaches you to build the wrong kind of status.

Yes ... there are two kinds of status.

I'm not making this up.

This is according to research done at the University of British Colombia back in 2013.

The Two Types Of Status

An easy way to understand these two types of status is by picturing two chimps.

Chimp A and Chimp B.

Chimp A is called Titan.

He's a very scary chimp.

He's the baddest and meanest in the group.

He uses intimidation and fear to get what he wants.

One day, he decides he wants to be the alpha.

Titan starts kicking ass, making all the other chimps afraid of him.

He has fun being the king, enjoying having his pick of the ladies and eating before anyone else, until one day...

The other chimps decide they're tired of Titan's bullshit.

They gang together one night and tear him to pieces.

Now let's look at Chimp B.

He's a very wise chimp named Sage.

He's not as big or as strong as the other chimps.

But he has a different set of skills.

He's the most socially-intelligent chimp in the group.

He's well-liked and connects with the other chimps.

When there's a conflict, Sage is right there to de-escalate and bring the group back together again.

He's also wise and intelligent.

He's great at using tools and teaching other chimps to use them.

To the other chimps, Sage is the beating heart of the group.

And after the current alpha passes away, they choose Sage to be the leader.

Sage enjoys a long and peaceful reign beloved by the other chimps before dying from old age.

These chimps are very different.

Titan became the king through dominance.

Sage became the king through prestige.

Most advice out there teaches men to raise their status through dominance which is all about intimidation, coercion fear and aggression.

  • Get jacked.
  • Don't ever break eye contact first.
  • When shaking hands, grip harder to establish dominance.

This is a bad long term strategy.

If you're lucky, you might raise your status, but you don't have genuine, healthy relationships.

People defer to dominant leaders not because they want to but because they’re afraid of what will happen if they don’t.

The people around you fear you.

And because dominant leaders tend to be aggressive, disagreeable, narcissistic, and manipulative... they also dislike you.

On this channel, we're all about becoming men who have healthy, fulfilling relationships.

So that's why we're going to focus on the other type of status.

Prestige.

Prestigious leaders tend to be agreeable and conscientious with high self-esteem.

Instead of using fear, they attract people by demonstrating skill and success.

While dominant leaders are selfish, sacrificing the needs of the group to meet their own.

Prestigious leaders prioritise the needs of the group, without sacrificing their own needs.

However, when it comes to building prestige, there's a problem.

Building prestige means becoming amazing at something and sharing that skill with people.

But prestige in one area doesn't always translate to prestige in another.

You can be a world class chess-master but you'll still be just another awkward dingus in the club.

Is it really worth building one skill at the expense of the others? How do you even now which skill to build?

If only there was one way to build a kind of prestige that translates across all dimensions.

Luckily for us, there is.

You do it by building something called universal prestige.

And the way you do it is through developing your social skills.

Better social skills raises your prestige in every social environment.

It doesn't depend on your skill or knowledge in a particular area.

When you build it, you take it everywhere you go.

To build your social skills, there are only three areas to focus on.

Get good with these three and it will change your life.

Three Steps To Building Social Skills

Method One: Building Self-Esteem

Back when I was doing pick-up, I learned a painful lesson.

In the beginning, I tried all kinds of tricks to convince a woman that I was this smooth guy.

But the harder I tried, the colder the reaction.

Why was this?

Because no matter how hard you try, you can't fake confidence.

This is why most of the advice I give on this channel is related to fixing your inner world.

80% of the shift comes from what you believe about yourself, other people and the world.

No amount of social skills training will help you if you have low self-esteem.

So the first step is also the most important.

Do the inner-work on yourself.

  • Find your purpose.
  • Learn your values.
  • Fix your negative beliefs.
  • Develop a strong identity.

And it will make the other steps 10 x easier.

Method Two: Improving Conversation Skills

Let's say you've got high self-esteem.

You still need to learn how to talk to people.

This has always been the area I paid attention to the least.

Because I've always noticed that by doing the inner-work on myself, conversation flowed easier anyway.

But I missed an opportunity.

Because your conversations, sense of humor, your listening ability and your banter are all skills you can improve on.

And that's why it's important to work on your ability to communicate, persuade, charm and converse.

Method Three: Become A Social Leader

What I'm about to share with you will boost your social status practically overnight.

Back when I lived in Lisbon, I didn't know many people.

So I started a local men's group and ran events.

And to my surprise, tons of guys showed up.

Suddenly, I went from feeling lonely, knowing nobody and playing video games in my apartment to being a well-known event planner in a gorgeous city.

If you want to boost your status...

Run events, create groups and get comfortable introducing people to one another.

Those friends you make while rock climbing at the gym? Invite them to hang out with your friends from your dance class.

Take them all out for laser tag, karaoke, bowling, or the local festival.

Talk to new people at your venues, introduce them to your friends, and start inviting them to events as well.

Suddenly you’re a source of fun and a networker of people.

You’re the reason your friends hooked up.

You helped your buddy find his new job. You are valuable.

And it didn't cost you a penny.

(Okay, maybe you spent some money on nights out and stuff but you don't need to become a 7 figure entrepreneur)

Thanks for reading.

Oliver.


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how to become high status in 2024


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