I often receive comments from men on my channel claiming they are nice guys and won’t change for anyone.
Many men pride themselves on being nice guys.
But what if nice guys aren’t nice at all?
What if they’re just scared?
Let’s say you call yourself a nice guy.
On the surface, you avoid conflict wherever possible. You say nice things to people. You try not to come on too strong with women. You aim to live a smooth, problem-free life.
But there’s a problem.
This way of living (being nice) creates a multitude of issues in your life and in the lives of those around you.
If you’re anything like many of the men I’ve worked with over the years, you might find that you:
-
Say yes to everything and hate yourself for it later
-
Do favours with a quiet resentment people can feel
-
Feel taken advantage of, like you give more than you get
-
Shrink or go quiet around more confident, outgoing men
-
Snap in private or rage alone in your car for no reason
-
Say what others want to hear instead of what’s true
-
Freeze up when trying to escalate romantically
-
Struggle with self-trust and self-esteem
-
Secretly resent women for choosing bad boys
-
Get stuck in the friendzone again and again
I could keep going.
I’ve been working with men on the Nice Guy trap for years.
And at this point, I’ve made it part of my mission to help men see “nice” as a red flag in themselves.
Because when you explode in anger, simmer in resentment or lie to keep the peace…
Is that really kindness?
Is that truly “nice”?
Or is it just fear disguised as virtue?
You tell yourself you’re doing the right thing.
But maybe you’re just doing the safe thing.
I’ll say it clearly.
A man who is excessively nice is a coward.
But here’s the good news.
You don’t need to become a dickhead.
You don’t need to dominate, manipulate, or play games.
All you need to do … is get REAL.
Tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Set boundaries without crumbling from guilt.
Say what you actually mean.
Ask for what you actually want.
And stop giving your energy to people who don’t truly appreciate it or even respect you deep down.
Nice Guys wear a mask to survive.
A confident man takes the mask off and shows up authentically.
This is the work I do with men every single week.
We dismantle the old identity, piece by piece.
And we build something grounded in truth, authenticity, courage, and confidence.
And it starts with one decision:
Are you willing to stop being nice and start being honest?
If you’re ready to stop hiding and step into real masculine leadership…
I offer private 1:1 coaching for men who are ready to do this work.
It’s not cheap. It’s not therapy.
But it is the most direct path to becoming the man you were always meant to be.
If you feel the pull, click here to book a call and let’s talk.
And if you aren’t convinced … click here to read inspiring stories of many of the other men who’ve worked with my over the past 6 months (you will be inspired).
This could be the moment you stop living in fear.
And I wonder…
What kind of man could you be in six months?
Stay courageous,
Oliver